May 11 2009
Annie Duke on Celebrity Apprentice had it right! Stand up to name calling in a relationship.
I love watching drama television like Celebrity Apprentice because of the little cracks in relationships that it shows. No one did a better job this season than showing how nasty certain women can get towards other women. It’s also a great mirror for looking at things that can change in your own relationship.
Last night Donald Trump announced that Joan Rivers was the 2009 Celebrity Apprentice. Based on the name calling that Joan Rivers did during the weeks of show, I think that Annie Duke should have won. Flat out name calling inside a board meeting should not be allowed. It happens in a relationship but it should not be allowed period.
Why does name-calling hurt a relationship? Name calling in a relationship usually happens when one person doesn’t know how to communicate exactly how they feel so they resort to degrading the other person.
Annie Duke did the right think on Celebrity Apprentice when she tried to talk to Joan Rivers again and again about being referred to as Hitler. Of course Joan Rivers did not want to mend the relationship and continued with the name calling to the point of calling poker players white trash. Not a smart move Joan Rivers, there is over 40 million poker players in the world today.
So how can two people quit calling each other names and mend the relationship? My husband and I have made a pact with each other. We have promised to point out if name-calling has happened and then find ways to stop it.
Don’t be afraid to point out what is happening. Name-calling can kill any relationship if it goes on for too long.
One way is by not talking in anger. If either of the people in the relationship is unable to discuss how they feel then step away for a bit. It’s better to say I need to collect my thoughts than to let poison spew from your lips.
What if you’re the person that is doing the name-calling and you want to stop? It takes a conscience effort to stop name calling in a relationship. By wanting to stop, you have taken the hardest step. Now all it takes is a conscience effort to tell people why you are angry with them instead of calling them names. With time, you will realize that it is no longer happening.
If you are struggling with name calling in your relationships, I hope that you find this blog post helpful. I personally have been in relationships where name-calling and personal attacks have killed it. So it is my hope and prayer that you are able to mend your relationship with this new found knowledge.
